Survival (Part 2)-Retreat

I couldn't slept.My eyes are tired but I couldn't slept.My ears kept listening to sounds,a crack,a tickling,anything that tinnily sounded.My eyes kept staring at the door,at the floor,if the light were on.I was waiting for them to realized that their gay son had came back.Suddenly my eyes slept.

ZzzZzzZzzZzzZzz*snort*

I woke again.It was 6 morning.I should get ready to get dressed,get out from the house as soon as possible,maybe I too afraid to confront this to my dad.

In the afternoon,while I was break from my job,suddenly I saw my brother with his friend,I tried to hide myself but nothing could hide me,as we saw each each other.I faced him,with all my guts,trying to deny whatever gay stuff he'll spill out later.But he wasn't,like nothing happened,or maybe because his friend were there,he couldn't tell any.He just tell me to go home as he never saw me that night.I was so relief,maybe my dad haven't told them yet.

"You're gay,right?""For God sake,I'm not!"

But I not going home tonight.I straightly went to the place where I used to spend my entire night life.Not club,mind you,it's Internet cafe.

What happened in the next morning,I couldn't reveal to anyone,which I made a promise to that person.So,skip to when I went home at 11 morning.I went in and saw my mother there.Uh oh OMGWTF!OK,what you wanna say,ya better say it now! But she just asking me where I went,no more than that.After I hand the money to my Aunt Lara to give later to my dad,I went have breakfast with my mum.While we walking,I told her the news about a 14 year old son punched and swore to his mother,because his mother found out that his son had a boyfriend,20 year old.His mother asked him to leave his boyfriend and this gay relationship,but the son wasn't listen,he scold her mother,told her that she wasn't deserved to be a mother to him,which she can't afford whatever things he need,which his boyfriend gave him money to support the family,before laid his hand to his mother.

We went back after breakfast,from the kitchen window before I were in front of the gate,I saw a half naked figure of a man.Who'll it be if wasn't my dad?I quickly open the gate,if I could cast haste spell on me to make me escape from him.And he,like nothing happened last Sunday,and how about the gay word I told him?Nothing,not even a conversation between us,as usual,there's nothing to talk about.

I had my mother in the room,play Lady Gaga's,and told her the incident that happened but I'm never told her that I'm gay,trying everything to denied myself a gay in the room.Then we had a talk about the gay boy news we talking,then celebrities who was gay.We had GAY issues!My mother used to homophobic when it come to gay issue,but after I confront her about gay people,changed her view about gay people,and I succeeded.I could talk about gay stuff whenever I wanted to.

"OK,tell me what you want to talk,Bradley"

Later at night,my brother came back.I also told the incident to him (we often joked about gay stuff,where we always told my mother that he is gay,he told her I'm gay,just joking around),then my brother told me that my dad had told them,when I was not in the house,my brother jokingly told my mother that I'm gay,then my dad told him:"Your brother is GAY!He earned money by letting people fucking him!Don't know how many people had fucked him?!"Then I told him it's was just to pissed off him.

Since that day,whenever I went to Internet and only went home the next morning,

Mum:Spend your day with your boyfriend?
Bradley:Yeah,I miss him,I loved him,I need him,everything about HIM.

Wish I had a boyfriend to say that,and bring him back to introduce him to my parent(when I ready to do so).Well,now I should retreat to my closet again.

I love you,my future boyfriend.